I can’t deny that this is a small blog with a relatively limited fan base. Nevertheless, it amazes me the variety of searches that bring people to my page. Some of them are comic, sad, gross, and just pathetic.

In no particular order, here are some that I found entertaining.

1. How to pay for stuff in taiwan when you are a foreigner?

One word: cash. Bring plenty of it, and don’t bring your own smaller country denominations either. I brought a bunch of Polish money with me when I moved here and then couldn’t get it exchanged anywhere, including in Taiwan’s national bank.  Everyone told me to try Hong Kong. Good advice I’m sure but  I haven’t made it there yet. Eventually, I managed to exchange it with a friend that was returning to Poland, but I had to hang onto it for a year before I finally got rid of it.  Make sure its USD, EU, or Yen. I’m sure others are accepted too, but check before you come.  Your credit card will help in large department stores and chain restaurants, but no where else. Bring cash. I can’t emphasize this enough.

2. Vertebrae adventure

Yeah, I’m having one. If that’s what you want to call it. I hope yours has been more fun than mine.

3. Are australians hated by foreigners?

I have no idea. Are they?

4. (a) What do polish men want in a woman? (b) When do polish guys introduce there girlfriends to there parents? (c) How to get a stubborn polish man back? (d) “Polish men” in relationships take back seat.

(a) Good question. What do they want? This must be investigated!

(b) When? I’m guessing if you have to ask this question he’s not in love with you, girlfriend. Maybe if you learned the difference between “there,”  “their,” and “they’re” you’ll have better luck.

(c) Good luck. Polish people are stubborn as hell, and Polish men most of all.

(d) Hmmmm. There’s a story here and I want to hear it.

5. biggest sausage 

You’re talking about Polish sausage right? I hope. Or is this just another porno search?

6. Why do girls look like they like me but hate me?

I have so many questions about this. Maybe its because you’re an asshole, kid. Maybe they DO like you and you just don’t know how to approach them. Maybe you’re socially inept, and they didn’t like you in the first place?

7. Say chance

Are you going to come over here and make me?

8. (a) Mould is growing on all my belongings clothes shoes books. (b) If theres mold on your clothes is to late? (c) mold gray fur? (d) Why my laptop bag has mold? (e) If mold is on my leather shoes should i wash everything in my closet?

After talking to my friends, I’ve realized that my own experience is NOT unique. Is it too late? Wash everything. That’s my best advice. And I do mean everything. You miss even one spot and it will keep coming back. Recently, I’m starting to suspect I’m about to have another mold explosion too. God I hope not. Use vinegar, Clorox, or chlorine. Constant ventilation and airflow is the key to prevent this. Get a dehumidifier if need be.  Because it will grow on everything. Including apparently gray fur???? I didn’t even know that was possible.

9.  Xenophobia positives

There are none, jackass. Get yourself out in the world and learn a thing or two about life instead of punching in asinine searches like this. I’m disgusted.

10.  Highly educated traditional woman that likes golden shower lover girl

Sick!  I hope you washed your hands before you touched your keyboard but you didn’t, did you?

11. Best men to have one night stand with when living overseas

Which ones are they? Maybe I should be plugging this search in.

12. Taiwanese women are messed up

Come on. I don’t think they’re all messed up. Though there is something to be said about the reputation for jealousy in relationships with both male and female Taiwanese. I think it comes from not having a dating culture.

13. Why do we find foreign women exotic?

Yes, why do we?

Finally,

14. When to travel overseas with acute herniated disc?

Is this a serious question? Never. That’s when.

 

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